sicut cervus

"As the deer longs for running waters so my soul longs for You, my God."

-Psalm 42:2-

alone

My pace quickens as I move down the hall. I walk into the adoration chapel to find it completely empty -- we are alone. A huge smile curves up my lips as I walk to the front and knee down before Him, bow down and breathe I love you so much.

magnificat

I was sitting on a couch, working on a paper when my roommate popped in, granola bar in hand and said between bites:
"Do you want to know something cool I do after I receive the Eucharist?"
"Aw! What?" I replied, amused. My roommate is the most adorable creature to walk the earth.
"I say the Magnificat." She paused to swallow and bounced up and down a little bit as she continued, "Because Mary received Jesus and I just received Jesus. My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord, my spirit rejoices in God my Savior for He has looked with favor on his lowly servant. He just gave Himself to me and I get so happy..."

This simple outpouring of love from her gave me such joy. The unconditional, unafraid sharing of somebody's complete love for Christ or His mother is so beautiful and precious and only ever serves to glorify to Beloved. 

Another example is from a different friend of mine. We were sitting and talking and he said "I sometimes ask Mary to hold me because she is my mother and I am her son. When I see somebody else who is really suffering I ask her to hold that person instead and have me take on the pain." That warmed my heart -- especially coming from a guy. 

Our social nature is really brilliant because it allows us to see the various, beautiful ways God works in His children and draws them to Himself. *sigh* He is glorified so much through our social nature. 
 :)

Little Child

"Imitate a little child which will walk along with one hand clinging to it's father, and with the other gathering the wayside fruits. So whilst with one hand you collect and use the good things of this world, always with the other keep hold of your Heavenly Father, frequently turning to Him, in order to learn whether He approves your occupations and proceedings."

- St. Francis de Sales, An Introduction to the Devout Life

St. Augustine once said "Complete abstinence is easier than perfect moderation." This quote applies to so many situations in life but most certainly to the goods of this life. It is tempting enough to shun all earthly goods and refuse oneself any earthly pleasure and concentrate solely on the supernatural. But to shun the natural is also to shun the supernatural within them.
It may seem safe to avoid material things because we don't trust ourselves to take them in moderation but to do so is to skip over so many little ways He loves us. That piece of cake, swirly skirt, cup of coffee,  book, cigar or glass of wine brings delight! And why did He create us but to delight in Him? (God knew there were beings who would delight in His goodness and so He made them.)
A few weeks ago, I was driving back to campus with a friend after a wonderful evening of books, coffee and biscotti. We were driving with music up, windows down, and looking at a beautiful sunset. I could not contain the joy in my heart so I began to ramble to him about how amazing it all is. We could live a life of pain and suffering and still not repay Him for all the good He has done for us. But He doesn't just give us pain -- He gives us good! He not only gives us Himself in the Eucharist and all the wonderful sacraments but He gives us the little things; simple joys like coffee and cool breezes. 

three little verses

Last night in adoration He led me to these three verse -- each of which deals with an issue I've dealt/am dealing with. He's always there to take care of us if we just offer the time.

"Lust indulged starves the soul, but fools hate to turn from evil."
- Proverbs 13:19

"Happy the man who is always on his guard; but he who hardens his heart will fall onto evil."
- Proverbs 28: 14

"But the just man, though he die early, shall be at rest."
- Proverbs 4:7

a fool

How silly it is that my human pride flares up, dramatically wounded, when I am not recognized as I feel  I ought to be when You, pure goodness, are shunned and ignored as You wait, fully present, in a golden box veiled as mere bread. O, how foolish the human condition. O Lord, be merciful to me, a fool.

because I'm Yours

Every breath is a second chance because I am always Yours.

I have been surrounded by so many quotes, verses and passages lately that speak of God's loving choice to put us aside, actively freeing us and enabling us to live a life of freedom and joy instead of death and captivity. I can breathe and try again because, in Him, I have the gift of forgiveness and His deep, unrelenting love always surrounding me. Only because of Him do I have reason and ability to continue to rise again and fight till the death.

"But you, brothers and sisters, are not in darkness, for that day to overtake you like a thief. For all of you are children of the light and children of the day. We are not of the night or of darkness. Therefore, let us not sleep as the rest do, but let us stay alert  and sober. For God did not destine for us wrath, but to gain salvation our Lord Jesus Christ, who died for us, so that whether we are awake or asleep we may live together with him." 

--Thessalonians 5:9&10

freer of souls

I finally went to confession tonight after over a month of needing to -- my sins weighing, pressing on my heart. Usually I don't feel any different after confession but if I do it's in a negative way -- I can't explain it but it's an awful feeling. Tonight was the first time in my memory that I've been wanting to go to confession and come out feeling so much better. I sat down and wrote:

What is this freedom? Breaking and bursting -- a bellowing cry -- from my heart of joy. The weight is gone. The weight is lifted. I am Yours. Now I am at peace to consume You in the Eucharist -- to be united to You wholly -- I cannot remember the last time my heart has felt so light. O sweet Freer of souls, my Light and my Life. You wrapped me in Your arms and pressed me to Your most Sacred Heart so that now, with strength renewed, I may live for You, my King. 

Fr. Gregory then gave me a bible passage to read (Colossians 1: 9-14) which talked about how God has taken us from the doom of death and pain and made us fit to live for the Beloved Son and reach, finally, His kingdom. There is never reason to give up and let sin overcome -- we have the victory because of His deep love.